It is an easy thing to find inspiration and to dream big. The difficulty comes in persevering through the drought and continuing to believe it will become reality and the struggle is seeing it through to actuality. The growing pains of a dream are incredible and not many have the ability to see it through.
I think that many have thought that I have given up on my dream. On the promises that were made and stopped pursuing the one thing that my life had been focused on for so long. The problem arises when those around me who love and care deeply about me begin to put their hopes and dreams and expectations on to me and what they think my dream ought to look like. And it is with good intentions that they believed and encouraged and hoped for, but it was not what God had planned.
See, a long time ago I came to a resolve about my dream. First, that it was not mine, but God’s and therefore would be in his timing and in his way, not my own. I prayed constantly that it would be his and not mine. That I would not taint this dream, this plan, this mission with my own ideas about what it should be and what it would look like. Second, that He had a plan for me, that He would use all that I have been through, all my victories and failures for this and that I needed to grow in wisdom and in experience and come to place where I let it all go and began to trust in Him. That the dream was not what I was focused on, but in desperate pursuit of Him and in turn He has given it back to me.
It is amazing to me how good He is. How remarkable and kind and how His tender mercies allow for my indignant and rebellious nature to find my way back to Him with gentle humility.
I am in awe of being called chosen, beloved, known as a child of God.